My body has a painful process for dealing with stress... i've learned this over the years of dealing with fibromyalgia, which makes day to day life very difficult and making plans to do things that may flare anxiety also difficult. Plus i'm a worry wart, my doctor says that I must have a list of things to worry about, once I get past number one, I move on to the next. I realize that a certain amount of stress is healthy, but I guess I never really learned to deal with it properly. No, that's not true, I used to be able to deal with stress,... I blame fibromyalgia. It makes everything else difficult, so it must be what makes dealing with stress next to impossible at times also.
I've learned to deal with and counter-act some of the tricky habits my mind and muscles with conjure up before an event that has been on my event calendar. The night before is always the worst for my mind and for sleeping, as I will not be able to 'turn my brain off' or let my body relax and find 'the sleep place'. It's like I forget how to relax and how to sleep. I wish I had a built in "off switch". That would have been a great idea for God to include in His creation of Adam and Eve. I wonder why He didn't think of that.
With fibromyalgia,
SLEEP is the
MOST important element in your day, with out it, any energy you may have had, is used up in normal involuntary body functions. Fibromyalgia is a disease that is robbing your body of energy, this is part of the reason muscles are so sore. I don't understand how it all works, and to tell you the truth I don't think anyone really does, but I do know what it's like to live with it, and you learn a lot about something just by experience.
My pre-stress and pre-anxiety before an event, (even small events like family holidays, or just a doctors appointment) usually aides in my sleeplessness, (at least the night before, if not more,) which will also weaken my immune system at times. If the event is over physically strenuous, this will also impair my bodies ability to fight off any illness. Being sick during fibromyalgia flare up is always 10 times worse than "just sick", because I'm are already hurting and sore from 'fibro-aches', then sick on top of that making the 'fibro aches' that much worse too.
When I'm worried and stressing I tend to do the "perma-shrug". My shoulders will be permanently tensed up in the shrugging position and I won't be able to relax them. This causes all sorts of problems with my upper back, shoulders, neck and even pectoral muscles. Sometimes if I have to drive long distances before I get to the event, I'll perma-shrug all the way there without even realizing it.
Once I get to an event, I sometimes get the shakes. Hopefully this is not too noticeable unless you are looking for it and/or i'm trying hard to hold extra still to pour a drink, serve up some grub, or write. I fear that this will gradually get worse as I get older, as I'm sure it does for just about everyone, but i'm not even 37. Usually the shaking is when I'm in a fibromyalgia flare up, and/or suffering from anxiety or stress.
Once I am home again, I usually have a stressing mind race and replay the event in my head, worrying and hoping I did not say anything that offending anyone or made myself look extra dumb or evil. This can preoccupy me for the day and night, even lose sleep again over it and usually very sore the next day or three to recover.
Regular recovering lasts any where from 1/2 day to a week depending on how worn out I've let my body get and also depending on a million other circumstances. Usually if I'm keeping up on my sleeping, my stress level is low, I've been eating a well balanced diet with low fat, low carbs, and a lot of vegetables, not skipping meals, taking my medication, and staying active, I will be able to keep up on house work and still go out to dinner or shopping once or twice a week with family or friends. I still have days that I will just have to sleep all day. The weather is also a factor, as temperature and air pressure changes usually affect pain levels as well.
In any case, my body will finally relax from the stress and then the aches set in. The soreness could be compared to a really bad case of the flu, the worst you have ever had or could ever even imagine. Some people think fibromyalgia just feels like over worked muscles from working out at the gym too hard. That is so wrong. I wish, that pain is something I can deal with, and I would be able to do all the things that I miss doing! Fibromyalgia pain is a deep bottomless heavy inflamed throbbing stabbing with a constant tender aching, that is so overwhelming and sickening at times that's all i can feel and "hear". What I mean by "hear" is even when someone is talking in a normal voice in a quiet room it can be hard to hear them over the pain and be able to concentrate on the words to comprehend them. I say "what?" and "huh?" more times a day, it must get annoying! hehe Sometimes I even watch TV shows a second or third time because I know I missed a bunch, (thank goodness for DVR!)
If I just sit here and think about how bad I'm hurting right now, I can barely stand it. My eyes are watering from the pain, and it's all over me, even my face and teeth and the tips of my toes. My scalp where my hair is growing from the follicles is in piercing pain.
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